Example of normal math

1+1=2 bones

2+2=4 bones

4+4 bones delicious, but if only there was a way to get more bones.

Let’s try these same problems using modern relativity

1+1=10 bones

2+2=50 bones

4+4=100,000,000 bones. Now that is what I call delicious math!

Happy and milk bones 1

Hurry up Grandpa, by my math calculations you now owe me 1,000,000,000,000 bones not counting interest.

This new math is so delicious I wish that I could use modern relativity math for everything! With a few little tweaks think of all the wonderful things I could do with my new invention. With my new math

1 minute in the car would equal 1 meal out

2 minutes in the car would equal 3 meals out

3 minutes in the car would equal 10 meals out

and 4 minutes in the car would net me 100 tummy satisfying meals out

or even better

1 hour of work would equal 100 hours of pay

2 hours of work would equal 10000 hours of pay

3 hours of work would equal 100,0000,000 hour of pay.

Wow! Can you imagine how great the world would be if I could use this type of math? In a few hours I would be the richest pup in the world!  Imagine all the fun that I could have and all the bones that I would be able to buy. Why I would be the envy of every pup.


Hurray, I’m going to be the richest pup in the land thanks to modern relativity math.



This is so great, but…what if someone were to use my new math against me? Imagine if my grandpa said that

1 day out =0 rides

2 days out= 10 months without car rides

3 days out = 10 years without car rides

or what if my new math fell into the wrong hands so that

for 1 bark I owed them 10 bones

2 barks meant that I had to give them 100 bones

and 3 barks meant that I owed them 100,000 bones


What a horrifying picture, its enough to drive a pup to spend a month shivering under the covers.


I guess as satisfying as my new math might be, I will have to go back to plain old every day math. It might not be as yummy, but at least my bones are safe from ruthless bone stealing monsters.